Sunday, December 15, 2013

Santa's Coming, But First.....

We all know Santa has an easy gig.  He only has to work one day each year.  The elves have it rough, they must bustle around getting all those toys ready for 364 days.  And then Santa gets all the glory on December 25th.  It's just not fair.

You might ask your self what Santa is doing those other 364 days before his "Big Day".  Is he busy around the North Pole?  Is he overeating to maintain his rotund physique?  Does he spend his idle hours grooming his full white beard?  Is he busy snatching the cookies the elves have just baked?

What is the old duffer doing to pass his time?

As always this blog is on the lookout to find and report the cutting edge news from around the world.  And today I am about to break the biggest story so far.  The news is not intended for younger children because of it's disturbing and graphic nature.  If there are children reading this blog over your shoulder, please ask them to leave the room immediately.

I now have photographic proof and have personally talked with Santa to obtain a truthful and accurate accounting of where and how the mystery man spends his off hours.  To say the least, I am shocked.

A picture is worth a thousand words......

A true and unedited photo of "The Man"
I know my credibility and honesty have come into question following the unfortunate "Mowhawk-gate" incident, but you may rest assured that I did NOT photoshop the Pacifico bottle into Santa's hand.  This is the bold and plain truth.

Santa spends his off hours drinking Pacifico and enjoying the fine sunsets in Mazatlan.  He told me so himself.  It's the truth.

Your author and truth seeker standing next to Santa yesterday. I'm the rotund fellow on the left.
To prove that I had not gone out on the web and snatched a random photo I thought that a personal picture of Santa and myself would be further proof that this is NOT a hoax.

Santa is just another expat enjoying his down time in Paradise.  Why wouldn't he?

There are 24 days in December before Santa's "Big Day" and there are 24 bottles of Pacifico in a case.  A coincidence.  I think not.


  1. Dear ol' funny Dad: When will you be in WA state next?

  2. Trin-O-Jet, We will be back in Washington state in late Summer 2014. We will leave Arizona after Spring training and go East to Washington DC to see Matt's family in late May or early June. After that we will be heading slowly West for the next 2 months to be back in late July or early August.

  3. Definitely not a coincidence. I love your blog.