I Can't Afford to Die

Although I am debt free it has become apparent that I can not afford to die.   We spent the morning visiting the graveyards of New Orleans.  It's a fact, I need to put together a small fortune to prepare my final resting place, New Orleans style.

This is a simple example of how I must prepare.

Now you may be saying I am wrong.  But how could thousands of New Orleanians be mistaken?

Right now this row may do.

First I will concentrate on where.  There are dozens of choices.  Which cemetery?  What area?  Historic or new wealth area?  Decisions, decisions, what's an old man to do?

Aged iron and rust is a good option.

A little lawn out front.

Stacked stones may be to simple for my finely tuned sensibilities.

A dirt road in front of my grave.  I don't think so.

Once I have picked the graveyard, tomb location and style, the hard work will begin.  What fine art sculpture to place inside the tomb with me?

To learn the standard of those that have gone before me, we visited the most famous sculpture found in a New Orleans tomb.  The "Weeping Angle".

This will do.  But now I must pick a proper stained glass window to illuminate my statue.  This is not as easy as I thought it would be.

Blue seems subtle and dignified, just like me.

Add an "aura" to my statue and I am ready to go.

Perhaps a fresco ceiling would be overdoing it?
Remember, Russ, subtle and understated is best for a simple man.

Now to work on the music for the funeral.

I think it may be best to go back to my original plan from years ago.  Back when I owned the trawler, Terri said she could solve two problems at once.  She would place my remains aboard the boat, lite it afire and push it out into the Tacoma Narrows.

The perfect cremation.

Well I don't own a trawler anymore so the kayak will have to do.  Truly subtle and understated.